4 Hours To Talk

The best thing about golf

Golf is my hobby.  My pastime.  Also my curse, my flaw, my borderline obsession.  If you play, you get it.  If you don’t, I understand.  I don’t “get” a lot of things people do, from crocheting to mountain climbing.  We all have our quirks.  And that’s the cool thing about humanity.

This is not a quick read on how to hit the golf ball or bunker play, or putting.  Not even the weird outfits that some people think golf allows.  You either know one of these people or you’ve seen one.  Hey, I love bold choices.

The best thing I’ve found about the sport is it’s four hours with other humans.  It’s at a leisurely pace, and you can use this or ignore it.  I’ve played with some folks who are as friendly as a brick.  I’m happy to report that they are rare.

Most people will respond to how you treat them.  I love talking to people, and I think folks pick up on that.  I try not to be annoying and often fail.  Being aware of that helps.  

I’ve met some amazing people on the golf course.  Taking the time to talk to them is almost always a delight to me.

Phil is 91 years old.  He swings the club like really good players do.  And he is so humble.  I asked what was the best score he ever shot, and with a shy smile he said “I really can’t remember”.  His putter was very old, I asked when he got it.  He quietly replied, “In Brazil, when I played with my friend Lewis.  We played Sam Snead, and Lewis told me to use this putter, and after the match, he told me to keep it”.  

Allow me to translate a bit:  Sam Snead was one of the best players to ever pick up a club.  In golf, he is in the Wilt Chamberlin/Michael Jordan/Kareen Abdul Jabbar/Magic Johnson/Bill Russell rank of golf, to use a basketball analogy.  In football think Joe Montana/Johnny Unitas/Barry Sanders/Tom Brady.

His friend told him to keep the putter because I think he beat Sam Snead.  Mic drop.  My buddy asked how often he plays, and Phil responded “Whenever my wife goes to yoga”.  Talk about a couple who could give us all life lessons, not just golf.

Jim is a retired nuclear engineer.  I asked him if we would ever get over our fear of nuclear energy.  He told me that we survived the panic of Three Mile Island (look it up) and Chernobyl, and didn’t totally abandon the technology.  Both of those were human errors, and Fukushima was the ultimate Act of God.  Jim thinks more and more people see it as viable and sustainable and is the future.  I love talking to smart people.

Bobby Bonds was a baseball legend.  And also the father of Barry Bonds.  I had the opportunity to play a number of rounds of golf with him.  I won’t sugarcoat it, Bobby could be a bit prickly in those days.  But man could he hit a golf ball.  After a particularly majestic 5 iron to a par 5, roughly a 210-yard shot, hit by a man in his late 50s at the time, I asked him how he did that.  He turned and looked at me incredulously and stated “The ball is not moving!”  

I guess after you stare down a 100mph heater from Nolan Ryan or an inside pitch from Bob Gibson, hitting a motionless golf ball is not scary.  And a quick addendum, I saw Bobby after he had been diagnosed with a terminal disease, and he ran up to me and said “Gary!” And hugged me and asked me how I was and how he missed playing with me.  I’m thankful to the Almighty that Bobby figured it out.  He was the kindest and most gracious person whenever I saw him those last few times.  Rest in peace, my friend.

Go to the Pro Football Hall of Fame and you will find the bust of Ronnie Lott.  San Francisco 49er legend, and a Raider favorite.  I had the honor of having him join me for a round of golf for my birthday one year.  There were four of us, and we played a game where we were teams for 6 holes, so we all played as a team with each other.  The first team was me and Ronnie, and on the second hold, Ronnie had a long putt for par, I’m talking well over 20 feet, that would win us the hole.  

I called over to him, he turned his face to me, and I launched into the USC fight song, the one he would hear when his beloved alma mater would take the field.  His face grew determined, I like to imagine what it looked like right before he tackled a big tight end coming over the middle, he pumped his fist…and drained the putt!  I love telling my sons that I got to chest bump with Ronnie Lott!

Colt Ford is a delight.  He’s one of the smartest people I know in the field of music.  He has written a number of big hit country songs and is a successful touring act with his unique brand of country hip hop.  He also played golf professionally and has won the prestigious Pebble Beach Pro-Am.  Colt plays a lot of golf with his buddy Jake Owen, who played golf for Florida State and has also won the Pebble Beach Pro-Am.  Colt loves to poke fun at his looks, he’s not the tallest, he’s not the fittest, and he’s never going to be confused for Jake Owen.

Yet he beats Jake on a pretty regular basis.  Colt is also hilarious.  He told me he said to Jake after a match, where Jake was steaming over another loss “Jake, you know why you’re upset?  Cause in your world, a guy who looks like you should never lose to a guy who looks like me!”

Years ago, my general manager asked me if I’d take this band we had playing at a local club out to play golf.  I said sure, called my buddy at a local course up, and asked if he could get me a couple of tee times.  I was on the air when I got a call on my phone.  I answered it and the guy said “Hey Gary, this is Jason Aldean, we are supposed to play golf with you today.  Any way you could come pick us up?”  I explained that I was driving a Volkswagen at the time, but if he could handle the taxi cab (this was way before ride shares) I had handled golf and lunch.  He said, “Oh ok, sure, we can do that”.  

Yeah, I had four hours to talk music with a young Jason Aldean.  I told him I had no idea if what he was doing was going to work, but man I sure liked it.  We have always enjoyed talking with each other ever since.

Charles Kelley of Lady A can hit the ball a mile.  He’s also as nice as you hope he is.  Chucky, as I call him, is always so patient with me, because I do not hit the ball a mile.  So he has to wait a while before he gets to hit between shots.  One of the things I loved the most during a recent round was when he got an email on his phone and had to open it.  It was a sound file that Dave Haywood, the other guy in Lady A, had sent him.  Charles listened so intently, then called Dave. 

It was so cool hearing to life-long music nerd friends just do what they always do.  And probably would have always done it even if they hadn’t made it big in the music industry.  

Brett James is one of the best songwriters in Nashville, look him up, and see the hits he’s written.  He’s also one of the coolest guys in any room you are in.  We were playing golf one day and he hit a particularly bad shot.  This was unusual because he’s a good golfer.  He cracked me up when he looked over to me and retorted “That shot would bother me more if I wasn’t thinking about the show I’m doing for a rich man in Nashville tomorrow night.  That check will take the sting out of most shanks.”

I tend to go out to public courses and get on the standby list, and they put me in a group with others.  It was truly a blessing that both men I got placed with were both born and raised in Iran.  They had never met before.  One was 77 the other 41, and it was so interesting hearing them tell me about the era that they were raised and the harsh realities that they faced.  Both were also fiercely patriotic Americans, in a way that you don’t always see in people who were born here and haven’t faced difficult situations.  It was an honor to share their company.

It’s a huge desire that my sons will play golf with me.  I love the time I have with them with no distractions.  I delight in seeing them hit great shots, and it’s my hope that they are both better at the game than I ever was.  But I also want them to enjoy it for some of the reasons I do.

 When I go out as a single, I leave the house wondering what kind of new friend I’m going to make today.  

That’s one of life’s greatest gifts.